Tip #2 - Practice Using Open Questions

Open questions are questions that cannot be answered with "yes" or "no". Typically, they begin with "what", "where", "who", "when" and "how". When you ask an open question, you tend to receive answers with more information. They are a good way to learn what is important to the person you are conversing with.

Before your mediation, practice using open questions with a colleague. Invite your colleague to tell you about an incident. Ask up to three open questions regarding the incident. Once your colleague has answered, summarize what you have heard. Pause - allowing your colleague to confirm or correct what you said. If you were inaccurate, try again. If you were correct, ask your colleague to talk about another incident, ask 3 open questions, summarize and pause. You and your colleaque can take turns asking each other open questions.

One challenge many people face as they start asking open questions is that they tend to turn their question into one that is answered by "yes" or "no" by adding, "isn't that so?" at the end. If you do this, stop, chuckle, and re-ask your question without the ending.

Tip #1 - Select the Right Dispute Resolution Process

When you find yourself, or your business, caught in a conflict, court is not the only dispute resolution process to consider. There are others, such as arbitration, collaborative law, mediation or neutral case evaluation. These different processes each have unique features that you can match with your dispute.

Before making the dispute resolution process selection, write down:
- what the dispute is about,
- how delay will effect the dispute and each of the disputants,
- whether the commercial or personal relationship with the other disputant is one you would like to continue,
- what expenditure of resources (time, energy and money) does resolving the dispute merit,
- the risks or benefits of a public hearing and decision,
- the level of conflict escalation, historically and predictably,
- the ability of the disputants to participate in integrative problem-solving with or without a facilitator or mediator,
- your goals and objectives for the outcome.

The answers to these questions will help you to select the right dispute resolution process for your dispute at this time. And, in most cases, if the process you select does not result in a full settlement, you can still take your conflict to court.

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